Police wife/girlfriend, I understand what you are going through because I am you. I am a police wife of fourteen years and never have I seen the hate for law enforcement like I do today. Some days are worse than others, but it does not ever seem to get better. I know sending your officer out into the world given the current circumstances is terrifying, but please know, we can not live in fear. Here are my best tips for navigating the current climate whether you are a new police wife, veteran, or girlfriend. How to Navigate the War on Cops as a Police Click for more
How to Stay a Positive Police Spouse when it Feels like the World is Against Police Officers
In all my years as a police wife (13 to be exact), I have never struggled and seen other police spouses struggle as much as we are this year. We know support for law enforcement exists, but some days all we see or feel are those who are against police. It can feel like everyone hates them when in reality the bad people and horrible events are just drowning out the good. During such challenging times, I think a few things are important to remember. First, we have to focus on what we can control. If we are letting the negativity of the world control us and our emotions then we are Click for more
Black vs. Blue: Do We Need to “Pick Sides”?
Post written by: an anonymous follower and fellow police wife. This idea of Black vs. Blue is something I never thought I would feel the need to address. But before I get into in all that, let me tell you a bit about me. I am a 32-year-old successful Hispanic female who was born in Colombia and adopted at 7 weeks old. I am also married to an incredible black man who has a career in law enforcement. Growing up, my parents always promoted my Colombian background as much as they could. But before turning 18 and going to college, I had only ever had a few Asian friends, 1 Hispanic Click for more
Tips for Starting your Own Police Spousal Group
This is honestly such a popular question that I get asked ALLLL the time. Mostly from police wives that want to start a local spousal group through their agency or in the area where their spouse works. And it is no wonder that this is such a popular question: as spouses of police officers, we need support. Most of us long for friendship with others that experience the same journey as us. We are looking for people who "get it". Spousal groups can be so beneficial and wonderful if done in the right way. They can not only be a great way to find friendship but they can also serve to be an Click for more
Dear Police Wife, I See You (An Open Letter to Police Wives/Girlfriends)
To my fellow police wives/girlfriends, I see you. I see you hurting. I see your fear. I see the pain in your eyes. I see you changing your social media name and pictures and locking down your accounts for your safety. I see you telling your children that you can no longer tell people about what their parent does for a living because it puts you in danger. I see your tears the moment your officer drives away and the moment he/she pulls off that vest. I see it because I live it along with you. This post has been in my draft folder for over a week but it hurt to Click for more
How to discuss hatred for police and racism with your children
As a mother of three and former educator I know how difficult it can be to answer hard questions. Right now, it feels even harder as the wife of a police officer because we are having discussions about both the hatred police are facing and racism in the world. We want peace and understanding for both situations, which many people don't understand. I went back and forth on whether my kids were too young to know about what is happening in the world right now, but the fact of the matter is, we can't ignore it. Our children know our stresses, they feel the tension. They may even Click for more
Being a Police Wife when the World Hates your Spouse
Hate. It is a strong word, but the only word I can use to describe the nightmare we are in right now. Normally the posts you find on my blog are how-to's or advice on how to navigate something in police wife life, but this is a bit different. That's because our world is different. This post is my entire heart in written form because I love someone who loves his job no matter how difficult it is right now, yet, he is hated for it. I am fighting back tears just to see the keys on my keyboard to type this but it is important for me to write this and to be a VOICE for my fellow police Click for more
How to be supportive during a crisis as a law enforcement spouse
Sadly, as a spouse of a law enforcement officer, we are going to see our spouses/partners experience many difficult situations throughout their career. Whether that is a hard call, an OIS (officer involved shooting), difficulties within a department, or major incidents that make national headlines. All of these are difficult in their own way and they can be even harder to navigate as individuals, law enforcement couples and as a blue community. Whatever the case may be, you may need support as a spouse/partner AND want to know ways to support your officer during a time of need. Please Click for more
Debunking divorce rates in police marriages
This is a post that has been in my draft folder for months. It is one I should have written sooner- way sooner. Divorce rates among law enforcement marriage is a topic that our community hears about all the time. Nearly every week when I scroll Facebook or in a closed group for law enforcement wives, I see posts starting with "given the high divorce rate for law enforcement.....". Or I receive DMs on social media from police girlfriends/fiancés about how to prepare their relationship given the "current statistics". These posts break my heart every. single. time. Why? Because the Click for more
Must Have Mother’s Day Gift Ideas for Police Wives
Mother's Day is right around the corner. If you are like me, you want to scream off the rooftops to your spouse what you want for Mother's Day, but you like to be surprised. You secretly hope your spouse will figure it out on his/her own but that doesn't always happen, right? So just share this post or drop some hints to spark some ideas. :) So I know some of us like actual gifts for Mother's Day, birthdays, etc. You enjoy having a gift handed to you and being surprised. If you are like me, you don't buy yourself much, so you may have been eyeing something for a while and Mother's Day would Click for more
3 ways to have more quality time with your officer
This is a sponsored post on behalf of DateBox Club. All opinions are honest and my own. Nothing can be more stressful than trying to plan time with your spouse when their work schedule is crazy. Believe me, I have been there. Sometimes you feel like ships in the night never knowing when you will cross paths again. With my husband's schedule often being opposite of mine, it has always been a little hard to get quality time together. Add 3 kids to the mix and it just became harder. It left us with no other choice than to PLAN time together as best as we could so that we could make Click for more
Day shift vs. night shift: pros and cons for police families
The original idea for this post came from a past article I wrote regarding things that always seem to happen when you have a spouse working night shift. The response was overwhelming (in a good way) and many of you asked for pros and cons of night shift vs. day shift, so here we are. Shift rotations are tricky, for sure. What works for me may not work for you and your family. In addition, your shift preference may change depending on what season of life you are currently going through. When thinking about day shift vs. night shift keep in mind that there is no one-size-fits-all. Many Click for more
12 bucket list goals for the New Year for first responder couples
More often than not, we come up with goals and resolutions for just ourselves, which is great, but it is also nice to think about what we can do in the New Year as a first responder couple. First responder couples never take time for granted and one thing I know is that they try to maximize the time they have. It is so important for you and your spouse to connect and keep that connection alive. What better way to do that than to set aside time every few weeks/month for one another? Here are some great ways to make time for one another each and every month this New Year. 12 bucket list Click for more
Why you need an emergency binder as a law enforcement family
Life is inherently dangerous- we know this, right? But being married to a police officer brings this whole new level of awareness for the need to be as 'safe' as possible. (I quote 'safe' because it is a word that is relative and has a different meaning to each of us and our lives). Some of us have real fears and worries about our officer's job and when they strap that vest on. Others have dealt with said fears and you may see your spouse's job as just that, a job. Instead, you may feel the need to just want to be organized in case an emergency arises. Both are good and valid reasons Click for more
The easiest thin blue line craft for kids
My little ones love decorating the tree and creating new, homemade ornaments every year. The homemade ornaments are always the most sentimental to me and those go on our main tree in our living room. We also have a small thin blue line tree that we put up in my husband's man cave every year and this year when decorating it, our kids asked to make special ornaments for it just like they do for our main tree. In an effort to keep the craft fairly easy, I figured why not do a spin on a classic craft my kids love: Thin blue line candy canes! How to make this easy thin blue line Click for more
Why the holidays can be so hard for first responder spouses
I am the spouse of a first responder. It is not my title nor does it rule my life, but it does have a great influence on my family and I. It is also a portion of my life that I would not trade for the world. Being a first responder spouse means I make sacrifices all year long and the holidays are no different. While the holidays are considered the most joyous time of the year, it can be difficult for so many, including spouses of first responders. For every spouse that is used to the holidays alone, there is also a spouse struggling through it for the first time. While I Click for more
12 questions to ask your officer other than “how was your day?”
Sometimes it can be so easy to fall into a routine of asking "How was your day?" when your spouse first gets home or you talk on the phone. Believe me, I do it, too. But when our officers experience so much just during one shift, that can feel like a loaded question. They don't always open up about their day or that question feels so big that they couldn't possibly answer it. It may be an easy question for normal 9-5ers but for first responders, it is a hard one to answer. Their days are not always good when they experience crash scenes, missing persons, domestics, etc. Personally, if I Click for more
4 ways to disengage from “friends” that aren’t pro-police
Friends and family that aren't pro-police. Unfortunately, it seems more and more common lately and a super tricky one at that. Years ago when my husband was a rookie, I remember scrolling through my newsfeed on Facebook and seeing a not-so-positive post shared by one of my Facebook "friends". A friend I had through middle and high school, but not someone I really talked to in my adult years. Her shared post had something negative regarding law enforcement and was a HUGE generalization. I, of course, engaged. I commented. She then sent me private messages and we continued there. She was Click for more
18 memes all about police wife life
When days are tough or I just need someone to relate to, I love looking at police wife life memes or quotes. They give me inspiration, encouragement or even a good laugh. It's nice to know other wives are feeling the same way I am and did you know..these quotes/memes are for police girlfriends, too! And if you follow me on Facebook or Instagram, you know I love to create relatable memes and quotes all about police wife life. Without further ado... Memes all about police wife life: Oh yes, those pesky uniforms. If you have problems with uniforms all over, then I know many Click for more
(even more!) essential apps for police wives + officers
A super popular post of mine is about 7 must-have apps for police wives because most of us use our phones on a daily basis and are looking for ways to access information in quicker time and find helpful ways to make life easier. Since writing that post, I have found or used even more apps that police wives and officers can benefit from in some way. Whether they help with communication, scheduling, relaxation or time, I am sure you will find a new app to help you or your officer! Essential apps for police wives + officers: Calm Calm is a meditation and sleep app ideal for Click for more
An Exclusive Police Wife Box you don’t want to miss!
This amazing thin blue line inpsired box is back again! There are so many amazing subscriptions and themed boxes out there nowadays but there is no police wife box. And it is no surprise that we love the talented Emory Lane Co and we were so excited that they created the first of its kind, police wife box. This is the second run of the "Heart on the Line" box with all new items related to the thin blue line. This box is the perfect way to show your support for law enforcement. In addition, no items in this box say "police wife", most just have thin blue line inspired colors: black and Click for more
15 genius hacks for police wives you must try today
So I am allllll about making life as easy as possible. The world feels like it is moving at such a fast pace and it can be hard to keep up. Let's take some help where we can get it. These are my best hacks for police wives that will save you time, money and your sanity that you can use on a weekly basis! A crockpot/slow cooker, instant pot, or air fryer I own each of these and I use them every single week. The crockpot is great for soups, stews, pot roast and more! We love making fish in the air fryer in less than 20 minutes. And the instant pot is my favorite hack for making mashed Click for more
Dear new police wife, I promise it’s not all bad
Hey there, new police wife: Are you rather new to this lifestyle? Or maybe you're experiencing a different season and you aren't sure how to navigate those waters? Well, you've come to the right place. Let's talk, shall we (or in your case, just read)... It all started when he followed his dream and she stood by him (that would be you). I know all too well, how damn scary this lifestyle can feel. You turn on the news- you hear about cops. Your friends and family don't exactly understand what you're going through. The list goes on and on and I am sure I don't need to list them out for you. Click for more
The secrets no one told me about police wife life
If there could have been that one friend, just one, when I entered police wife life that could have shared all the ins and outs with me I would have probably stressed so much less. I envision her sharing her best advice, giving me encouragement and telling me it would be okay & sharing the tiny little secrets almost no one shares, all while being brutally honest when I needed to hear that, too. If you have that police wife friend, treasure her. Don't let that relationship go and keep it strong. Provide one another with all the love and friendship that you can while being flexible and Click for more
The requirements of being a law enforcement spouse
I am a woman that loves a man who has a career in law enforcement. Not to be confused with loving just a police officer because our loved ones are WAY more than just a police officer. I will always choose to love this man no matter how hard this career choice can be on our family sometimes. But sometimes his job as an officer, has me signing up for clubs that I didn't ask to be a part of, like the "attending holiday events alone club because, yes, my husband works on the holidays." Nonetheless, I still love this man and take pride in what he does for a living. As the Click for more
“Yes, I am still married.” Questions you hear when married to a police officer.
So one thing I never imagined while being in a service marriage (& being married to a police officer) is that I would get asked so many off-the-wall questions related to his job. Some are funny, but some are kinda, well, strange or unbelievable. Personally, I have been asked a ton of crazy questions, but I knew other wives who have been asked even funnier questions than myself. So for this post, I enlisted some help from my fellow police wives. So a huge shoutout to the wives who contributed to this post- I couldn't have done it without you! The unbelievable questions you may hear Click for more
How to create a police wife routine that works for you
When schedules conflict, it can be hard to find time to be with your officer. Especially when kids are involved. LEO has one work schedule, spouse has another. Then kid's are either in daycare or in school. Factor in sports and other extra-curricular activities. IT'S NOT EASY. Many LEO families find themselves balancing around their officer's schedule. It's common. But, again, NOT EASY. Generally speaking, there is no 9-5 schedule. Mostly just shift work. So, if that is your life, day in and day out, then how can you possibly create a routine? A routine that works for EVERYONE. I wish I could Click for more
The First Annual Police Wife Conference
Have you heard? We will be holding The First Annual Police Wife Conference from May 6-10, 2019, right before National Police Week! This is a police wife conference like no other! So what is it? The First Annual Police Wife Conference is a week long, virtual event. Once you register, you will receive an email each day of the conference with resources, support and, the best part, video interviews with experts from our community. It is time that we come together, as police wives, and equip ourselves with inspiration, support and tools to navigate police wife life! No Click for more
Mental fitness for police wives
This post is going to be super real and raw for me. As a police wife of 13 years, I know the mental trampoline our minds go through because of this lifestyle. Because of our spouse's jobs we often have a mix of emotions: happy, sad, proud, worried, fearful, stressed, tired, overwhelmed; maybe even all at once- sound familiar? You may not experience these emotions all the time, but you may feel mentally spread thin because your emotions change constantly. We often put the weight of what our officer's go through on our shoulders. We also carry the weight of stress Click for more
10 Pieces of Advice for a New Police Wife
Your husband just graduated from the academy. He is excited, motivated and ready to hit the road running for his first shift! Days turn into weeks and you quickly realize this job is more than just sending off your husband in a sexy uniform. You are flooded with emotions and questions. Are you ready for this new life? I surely was not when my police wife life began. I was proud of my husband, but advice and support for police wives was few and far between. I felt like I was drowning a little and my life raft was in view but I couldn't reach it. I seriously wish I had a place to find Click for more