You are a wife, maybe a mom, the maid, the chef, mrs. fix-it, the shopper, the planner, the budgeter, the chauffeur. Sound familiar?
As police wives, we take on a lot. At times, things run smoothly and other times we feel like we can not juggle one more thing or we may snap. Schedules are constantly changing within your family and, at times, we refer to our weeks as our husband’s “short week” or “long week” depending on how many days he works in a row. We often dread the “long weeks” and look forward to the “short weeks” so we can hopefully feel caught up on life.
It is so important for us to find the time to reset our bodies, our minds, and our family after those “long weeks”. It honestly depends on your personality, but maybe you are the type of person that needs to decompress each day, at the end of the day. Or, would you rather wait until the end of the week, maybe Sunday, to wind down and gear up for another long week?
I think I do a little bit of both and you may too. While I used to spend my evenings watching T.V. or relaxing on the couch, I now write. I spend countless hours on my computer writing about police wife life. While it is still like work, it is also my release. It is my quiet time away from my kids, housework, and life. I don’t look at my phone or Facebook and I completely focus on my writing.
It is also important to me to have down time one day a week. As we know, with police wife life, this could fall on any day of the week. It is usually a day our husband’s have off, so that we have a day to spend with him. So whatever day my officer is off, I try to block that one day off as family day. For us, right now, it is on Sundays. I don’t write on Sundays and we are basically cut off from the rest of the world. We like to soak in as much time with our kids as possible and makes lasting memories. It is always my favorite day of the week!
How do you reset after busy days and long weeks?
Here are some ways to help you reset as a police wife:
Writing in a daily journal can be a very therapeutic way to release daily stressors and reset after a busy day or week. All of your thoughts go onto paper and you can feel better while also looking back at your daily writing sessions and see the difference it may have made. Bullet journaling is also popular right now. Journaling is also a great way to redirect your fears as a police wife.
Ways to journal:
-With your officer. This is a great way to communicate when you don’t often see one another.
-With a fellow police wife or a friend.
A fellow police wife from our closed Facebook support group had an amazing story to share about journaling:
“My husbands’ FTO’s wife immediately reached out to me & we were integrated into their police family. I had a hard time opening up to the wives about how I wanted out, how we were too different and I had big goals and a cop some how didn’t fit in. She had a way of pulling things out of me & sharing her experiences, making everything ok. Her husband ended up retiring and they moved. I cried. There was no texting, no emailing, no being on the phone for long conversations without racking up a bill. So she said we would write letters. She told me how people used to do PenPal journals so we started one. I would keep the journal a couple weeks, some times write deep thoughts, some times share a recipe, glue in a pic or a drawing by my kids. I would mail it off to her, she would do the same and send it back. We did it for 8 yrs. It’s a way of talking about your feelings, just putting them out there without interruptions, without feeling judged about what you have to say, yet you know someone is going to read it, maybe supply some guidance or share their issue to let you know you are not alone.The neat thing is, the rule is, the person who buys and starts the new journal gets to keep it. It’s nice looking back on the years and friendships.”
Goal setting is a great way to feel a sense of accomplishment at the end of each day or week. It is also helpful to write your goals at the beginning of each week and reset to signify the start of a new beginning. Goal setting is a great way to block out unnecessary tasks associated with police wife life and keep you focused on the important tasks to get done, especially when you are juggling things alone. Sticking to your goals reminds you that you don’t have to do it all and it is okay to say no as a police wife.
How I use goal setting:
Each day I set mini-daily goals for myself (and my family). These are goals that I try to accomplish but if I don’t then they can easily be moved to the next day and I don’t stress over them. Examples: 3 loads of laundry, clean the floors, pull weeds in my garden, put dinner in the crockpot.
Each week (one day at the beginning of the week) I set larger-weekly goals. These are important, larger size goals that I must accomplish. These are different than my mini-daily goals. Examples: Pay bills, cut coupons for the week/month, plan my child’s birthday party, organize fall/winter clothes in my children’s closet.
I write my goals each day and each week in my personalized Erin Condren planner. When I was teaching, I used to purchase the Teacher Lesson Planner, but now that I stay home, I have switched to the Life Planner. I can create exactly what I want as far as colors, graphics for the cover, 12 or 18 month calendar, and more! It is exactly what I need to keep myself goal-oriented! If you decide to purchase one, then use my link to receive $10 off your first order! You won’t regret it 😉
I also have daily goals and weekly goals for my blog.
I enjoy goal setting because it keeps me focused, organized and I love the feeling I get when I am able to cross something off my list. At the end of each week I look at everything I have accomplished (some weeks are more than others) and decide what my next list of goals should look like. I am able to reset and it mentally prepares me for the next week.
Turn off communication.
While I always keep my phone nearby, as I am sure you do also, due to the nature of our spouse’s jobs, I do set aside time to not get on Facebook or social media. I also refrain from turning on the news or checking email. There are times that I just need to “veg out” and relax my body without any sort of distraction. Sometimes I take a bath, sometimes I read my police wife devotional, Cuffs and Coffee, or just spend quality time with my husband.
Whether you are a busy mom or new police wife that misses her husband, the law enforcement life schedule can be hard on us all. Finding healthy ways to deal with the stressors of police wife life is important. Comment below and let us know how you reset after a busy police wife week!
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